Low Wing Hong Alvin v Kelso Sharon Leigh

• Jurisdiction: Singapore
• Judge: Lee Seiu Kin JC
• Judgment Date: 25 November 1999
• Neutral Citation: [1999] SGHC 305
• Citation: [1999] SGHC 305
• Defendant Counsel: Randolph Khoo (Drew & Napier)
• Published date: 19 September 2003
• Plaintiff Counsel: Luna Yap (Luna Yap & Co)
• Date: 25 November 1999
• Docket Number: Divorce No 4324 of 1998 (Registrar's Appeal from the Subordinate Courts No 5034 of
• Court: High Court (Singapore)
• Subject Matter: Custody,Custody applications filed in Singapore and Australia,Civil Procedure,Family Law,Stay of proceedings,Importance of hearing all matters relating to family in one jurisdiction,Child of marriage physically in Australia,Divorce petitions filed in Singapore and Australia,Forum with strongest connecting factors

: This is an appeal from the decision of the District Judge Mrs Doris Lai-Chia Lee Mui on 13 July 1999 in which she refused to make any order on the respondent`s applications in SIC 50446/99 and SIC 50621/99. On 9 September 1999, after hearing counsel for the parties, I allowed the appeal and ordered that the proceedings taken out by the petitioner in this divorce action be stayed. On 29 September 1999 the petitioner filed a notice of appeal against my decision and I now give my grounds.

The background

The petitioner-husband is an architect and a Singapore citizen. The respondent-wife is a retail sales manager. She is an Australian citizen and obtained permanent resident status after her marriage to the appellant. Their marriage was solemnized at the Hong Kong Marriage Registry on 3 September 1994, under the provisions of the Hong Kong Marriage Ordinance. At the time they were working and residing in Hong Kong. On 7 November 1995, the sole child of the marriage, Ryan William Low Wei Ren (`Ryan`), was born in Hong Kong. Ryan is entitled to citizenship of Singapore and Australia. In March 1996 the parties and Ryan left Hong Kong to reside in Singapore.

In his petition for divorce filed on 14 December 1998, the petitioner gives the impression that the estrangement was sparked off by a single incident. This is how he described it in para 8 of the petition:

The said marriage has broken irretrievably in that the respondent has behaved in such a way that the petitioner cannot reasonably be expected to live with her.

Particulars

(a) On 23 February 1998, the petitioner at the respondent`s request joined the family at Brisbane for a holiday. The parties unfortunately had a quarrel while the petitioner was driving on 4 March 1998, and the respondent struck out at the petitioner while he was still driving. The respondent`s act aggravated the petitioner who was concerned that they were lost, and reacting to the provocation, the petitioner hit the respondent on her lips. The respondent took out an interim application for a protection order against the petitioner based on the incident which she started on 6 March 1998.

(b) The respondent also without justification alleged in her court documents that the petitioner was a violent man and prone to assaulting her. The respondent knew that the allegations were untrue and were designed to prejudice and cause hurt to the petitioner. The respondent knew that the petitioner had to return to work in Singapore on 8 March 1998 and would not be able to attend the mention scheduled on 19 March 1998 to defend himself.

(c) After the holiday ended on 8 March 1998, the respondent refused to return to Singapore with the petitioner and against the petitioner`s wishes, detained the child of the marriage in Australia with her. Since then, the petitioner has not been able to see the child.

(d) The respondent had insisted that the petitioner attend marriage counselling, which the petitioner did. However, when the counsellor asked to see the respondent, the respondent refused as she considered that all the problems in the marriage were due to the petitioner`s conduct. The respondent`s behaviour made it difficult for the petitioner to try and salvage the marriage.

(e) On 16 October 1998, the respondent started proceedings for custody, care and control in a Brisbane court and informed the petitioner that he could visit their child only if he agrees to certain terms being made in her favour. The terms were unfair and unreasonable, and the petitioner was therefore compelled to take out these proceedings and apply to the Singapore court for an interim order for joint custody, care and control. The application is still pending.

In his affidavit filed the same day, the petitioner is even more succinct. He describes the incident at para 4 in the following manner:

On or about 13 February 1998, the respondent brought Ryan to Brisbane Australia. The arrangement was for me to join them later which I did on 23 February 1998, as I could not leave due to work commitments. Unfortunately, while driving and having lost our way on 4 March 1998, the respondent and I quarrelled which resulted in her hitting me and me retaliating. The respondent took out an interim protection order against me in Australia on 6 March 1998, and I annex a copy of the said summons and her affidavit as exhibit `AL-1`. Although I disputed the allegations in the affidavit, I could not stay in Australia to attend the mention scheduled on 19 March 1998 as I had to return for work. The respondent since 5 March 1998 took Ryan away from me despite my protests.

Any suspicion that there is more to it than this is borne out by a perusal of the respondent`s affidavit filed on 22 February 1999, in which she states at paras 26 to 39:

26 The petitioner is a hot tempered and violent person. Throughout the short period of three years and six months of staying with the petitioner, I was subjected to the petitioner`s physical and verbal abuse. He has physically assaulted me on no less than ten occasions in the past four years and this would generally consist of instances of which he would strike me with a clenched fist. I would sustain bruises, cuts and abrasions from these instances of physical abuse.

27 The petitioner is also quarrelsome and petty. The instances of abuse would begin when he deliberately provoked me and picked on minor issues and developed them into major arguments. This would lead to sarcasm and abuse yelled at me in the presence of Ryan. Ryan would be so affected by the mayhem that he would cry uncontrollably in frustration.

28 The petitioner constantly engaged in verbal abuse. He has a penchant for using swear words and vulgarities at the slightest of things. All his traits demonstrate his lack of self-control and insensitivity to his family`s feelings.

29 The petitioner`s violent tendencies was manifested as early as one month after we registered our marriage. Two days after we returned from our honeymoon, on 18 October 1994, the petitioner verbally abused me. He continued to do so throughout our marriage.

30 The first time the petitioner hit me was in February 1995. I had a fight with him and he had struck me across the ear and the face. I can recall this incident clearly since I was suffering from the flu at that time and had to visit a doctor at the Discovery Bay clinic the following day. Upon the doctor`s examination, the doctor told me that my inner ear was bleeding. I also discovered I was pregnant around that time and therefore I was embarrassed to tell the doctor that it was my husband, the petitioner who had struck me and caused my ear to bleed.

31 After Ryan was born in November 1995, we had a brief period of marital bliss for about 4 months. However, the petitioner became prone to his violent nature after that. Since then, the episodes of violence and brutish behaviour by the petitioner became more frequent and each time he used more force than the last. I have noted the many sad incidents of violence. Some are detailed below.

32 In April 1996, the relationship between the petitioner and I worsened because the petitioner started becoming abusive again. I can recall that he punched me in the arms on at least two occasions on 11 April 1996 and 17 April 1996.

33 On 13 September 1996, the petitioner threatened to hit me and made Ryan scream and cry. Ryan wanted to come to me but the petitioner would not allow him to. He then punched me in the arm again. I called the police to the flat but my neighbours talked me out of making a complaint. The police assured me that I could ring them at any time.

34 The petitioner would also go out to drink after we quarrel, and would come home to hit me after that. On 16 September 1997, the petitioner returned home from drinking and punched me in the back when I was sleeping.

35 On 10 October 1997, I had a fight with the petitioner. He physically threatened me and as a result of my fear of being punched by him, I asked my neighbour for shelter for the night and took Ryan with me.

36 On 19 November 1997, the petitioner threatened to punch me again and this time Ryan and I drove to the petitioner`s parents` home to take shelter. Even the maid asked if she could follow since she was scared of the petitioner as well.

37 At this point, I informed the petitioner`s mother and sister-in-law that I could not tolerate the abuse any longer and that I would be moving to Australia to find a job. Even though I had approached the petitioner`s mother and sister-in-law many times to see if they could communicate with him about his violent nature, they were unable to do anything. They were aware of the petitioner`s abusive nature and yet refused to believe that he had a problem and needed to seek help.

38 I refer to para 4 of the petitioner`s affidavit. The petitioner and I were already experiencing difficulties in our marriage prior to our trip to Australia in February 1998. Before coming to Australia, on 20 December 1997, I informed the petitioner that if he did not do something about his abuse, I would not return to Singapore and remain in Australia with Ryan. Upon saying so, the petitioner punched me twice very hard on my left upper arm and that left a painful and large bruise. This time, even when the petitioner`s mother spoke to him about his problem, it was to no avail.

39 In February 1998, the petitioner joined Ryan and I for holiday in Australia. On the evening of 4 March 1997, the petitioner took a wrong turn while driving. I was holding the street directory and he blamed me for the incident. He swore and verbally abuse me. I was fed up and hit the petitioner on the arm with the street directory. At that point, the petitioner hit me with a clenched fist to the left of my face in the region of my nose and upper lip. This caused my lip to split and bleed profusely. At that point, I told...